Another Year in Review...

2011 certainly did not disappoint! 
-We started the year with sending our dossier to Colombia, which was a big step and a huge relief!  It took 6 months (half the year) until we heard that we were approved for 2 siblings 0-4 yrs.  So now we wait...
-We set a a few big projects to work on throughout the years to ready our home for a family of 6 and have accomplished a few of them.  One being we finished our very large basement!  We were under construction for 4 months, but it is finally complete and ready for 4 children to run and play and grow.  We also added a large deck off the back which pretty much finishes up the final touches of our home which we built and moved into 3 1/2 yrs ago.  As our boys continue to grow we realized we needed one more thing in our backyard that every parent will contemplate at some point or another...a swing set!  So we set out on an adventure to find the perfect swing set that would not only accommodate many children but also grow with them.  We are proud to say after a lot of sweat and equity we have a swing set!  Our last project was the combined masterful planning for my obsession with organization and Charlie's compulsion with building and playing with tools; cubbies!  Yes, Charlie built me 6 large individual cubbies!  Big enough for us and 4 full grown children!  He amazes me everyday with his ability to design and build things.  I am truly blessed to have this man as my husband.
-Just a quick note that we still have one more big project, adding a bathroom! 
-We got back in shape this year too!  I have always been in love with food and been very active working out, but after 2 babies in 1 1/2 years I lost my mojo.  I am happy to say that I lost 10 lbs this year and got my body back!  I have found time to exercise again and have started to feel remnants of my pre child self.
Now that we are 6 months into our wait I can say I still feel as if it is forever away that we will meet our children.  We talk about them often, are they born, are they being held and loved, are they being provided for, will they be boys or girls?  Sometimes it is hard when I see people around me getting pregnant and having babies knowing I no longer have that option.  Then I realize that I did have that option and try to be grateful for that, but a little part of me will forever mourn.  It is wild how this life we live throws us so many curve balls and it is up to us to have the tenacity to navigate them.  Charlie and I had a vision to have a large family and I can say I never thought we would be heading down the path we are now.  BUT and that is a big BUT I am soooo very excited for this journey!  The path that I have traveled down was truly meant for me in so many ways.  I am a forever changed person.  I have traveled many paths and experienced many more things that I would ever have thought possible.  I have really looked at the world and the people around me differently.  I have become a better wife, mother, and person all because of Colombia.  So as the years go by I will continue to reflect on my life, how it has changed, and how it will change.  I will continue to prepare to become a mother of trans racial children and biological children at the same time and I will continue with every ounce of me to strengthen my marriage through this process.  So as we head into 2012 my hope is that it is a quite year.  We have no big plans, but to just be.  To reflect on the crazy few years we have had ranging from a miscarriage, building a home and moving, having 2 children in 18 months, realizing we can't have any more children, a big career move for me, and this amazing journey to adoption.  It has been a tremulous few years filled with grief and happiness.  I can say 2012 has brought a big sigh of relief.  I feel as if I have run a marathon and now it is all about maintenance.  This is the year I hope to just chill out and see what happens.  Happy New Year!!!